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Monsters in the Hall

Duck Macatarsney is a sixteen year old girl with an overactive imagination. Her mother died long ago in a motorcycle crash. She lives with her biker Father who has Multiple Sclerosis and who smokes dope to minimise the symptoms. Caring for her dad and trying to cope at school puts a strain on her which she vents in her fantasy writing.

One day Duck is told by a teacher that Social Services want to send round a lady to see how she and her father are ‘getting on.’ Duck is determined not to get taken into care. She and her dad have to put on a show of normality for the lady. Which would be fine except, teen heart-throb Lawrence Lofthouse has just come over with a proposal, there’s s strange Norwegian death metal chick at the front door and this morning Duck’s dad has woken up blind.





Are you ok.


Yeah fine.








Switch the light on would you.








Dad, the light’s already on.


In 2007 I was hillwalking in the Ben Lawers range with Alan Wilkins. At the time Alan was a guidance teacher at Inverkeithing High School. Alan told me about some of the pupils referred to him who had the responsibility of looking after parents who were suffering from illness, or depression, or alcoholism. I thought that would be an interesting subject for a play. Later I made contact with Fife Young Carers. FYC workers told me one of their hardest jobs was getting kids to come forward for help. Kids didn’t want to be taken away from their parents, or to be stigmatised, or to have their parents feel stigmatised so they would pretend everything was all right until matters reached a crisis point.  The workers introduced me to some of the kids in the support group. We did some writing work and some drama sessions together.  They were a bright, witty group who wrote some brilliant material.  I told them I wanted to write a play about a young carer. I asked them, ‘what do you think is the single most important thing I should do in this play to make it ring true?’ Almost as one they said, ‘Make it funny’. So that’s what I tried to do.

Title: Monsters in the Hall
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Foreign Performances: None
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Characters:  (Male -  Female – )